6/22/07 - It Could Always Be Worse

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/06/22/six.flags.accident/index.html

A friend of mine just sent me that article so apparently, it can always be worse. I am not sure why pointing this sort of stuff out is considered a valid condolence technique. But is and it is employed far and wide by friends and family trying to comfort and console. But it isn’t really very comforting to know that some 13 yr old just got her ankles torn off. But maybe it isn’t about comfort. Maybe its about perspective. Maybe its about being reminded that in the grand scheme of things my life is pretty great. And I can get on board with that in general. But I have to say, knowing that this poor kid is looking at a lifetime without feet does not really make me feel much better about the fact that I can’t bathe without sitting on a stool. I feel badly for her but no more or less so than I would if I weren’t crutching around my living room and calling that exercise. Does this make me a bad person? Don’t get me wrong, there was an instant when I read that story (or when I hear all the other stories of awfulness in this world) when I was washed over with a giant wave of relief. But the relief is temporary. Because I just don’t think joy is sustainable if its really just the absence of pain.

I don’t think we should spend our lives muting our own pain, dissatisfaction, disappointment, and loss by focusing on those far worse off. I think that does our blessings a disservice, like they’re only blessings in contract to someone else’s lack of them. I think we need to be aware of our blessings and our gifts so that we can fully experience them and be grateful for them and protective of them. But I don’t consider myself blessed only b/c I know there are people are out there starving and dying and being abused. I just consider myself blessed. I just also consider myself broken right now and no amount of someone else’s trauma is going to make me feel better about that. All of that said, when I started writing I was thinking “blah blah blah, it could always be worse” the very next thought was “yeah it could have been, you could have jumped into that water head first”

So don’t get me wrong, I know things could always be worse. Way worse. So I think I will continue to be really pissed off about being broken but I will make sure that every time I curse this busted up leg of mine I will find something to bless. Not comfort but perspective.